Michael Passes Marcus to Win "Dumbest Vick" Title

Sibling (or half-sibling) rivalry is one thing, but the Vicks have taken it to a whole different level. Enough ink and PETA spittle has been wasted on how awful dog-fighting is. The thing I was left wondering is "Are there any other sociopath Vicks out there?". Let's take a quick look at these two nutbars.

Marcus Vick's laundry list of offenses involves guns, sex, alcohol, drugs, speeding, and stomping on the same Broncos D-lineman, Elvis Dumervil, that became the 1000th member of the "Make Kwame Harris Look Foolish Club" last week. So there's your Niner Faithful connection. Troy Smith is what Marcus Vick could have been. This is what Marcus Vick is:



Michael "Ookie" Vick apparently likes dogs. But only if they are fighting each other or he is killing them, in case you haven't heard. He also has plead guilty to the charges the grand jury brought against him. His NFL career is, in all likelihood, over and done. Commissioner Goodell may ban Vick for life using the cover offense of gambling. Or he could be a man and bar The Dirtiest Bird for being a malevolent sociopath (which he should). Or Goodell could simply let the likely 12-18 month prison sentence Vick is headed toward take its toll on Vick's skills. 23 hours in a cell and an hour a day spent running from guys who would love to tell their buddies on the outside that they caught the NFL's fastest player from behind (pun intended) isn't quite the same as keeping yourself in game shape for 8 months a year.

Above: Mike Vick's executioner. Note the uncanny resemblance to Larry Allen

Say bye-bye to the Vick family. They could (Ed: Emphasis mine) have challenged the Mannings for NFL quarterbacking supremacy. Instead, they're just a couple of busts.